Have you ever written a Love Letter to your business? Some girlfriends and I have been reading John Gray's Mars & Venus on a Date to learn or refresh our memories about the 5 stages of dating:
- Attraction (chemistry)
- Uncertainty (still playing the field)
- Exclusivity (commitment)
- Intimacy (sex)
- Engagement (practice for marriage)
We laughed, very hard, about how too often, we've gone from Attraction to Intimacy and:
- skipped the Uncertainty stage, because of scarcity (there aren't any other good men out there, this is the end of the line)
- skipped Exclusivity stage, because of low self-esteem (we should settle for whatever crumbs we're dealt)
Sooo many overachievers, high functioning, super intelligent women do this. Don't worry, you /we are not alone in this. We could spend years in therapy dissecting why... or we could re-purpose this wisdom for bigger, better things.
Re-purpose dating rules for business
If you've ever read the bible of "Think and Grow Rich" by Naopleon Hill, you'll know that decisiveness was the first key to everything!
When you combine dating stage of Exclusivity with the decisiveness of "Think and Grow Rich", you get:
- a colossally powerful force of devotion from you --> to your business, strong enough to make the Earth stop spinning a moment,
- and in return (Law of Attraction), an equally powerful force of devotion from your business --> to you, strong enough to make the Earth spin in the other direction for a moment.
Are you exclusive with your business?
Really think about it, are you 1000% decided, exclusive, committed and devoted to your business, as if it were a live human romantic partner? Are you flirting elsewhere with other business ideas, other sources of income, or drooling over yoga teacher training in hopes that it might devote itself to you?
Really think about it...
As long as you don't decide to make the Earth stop spinning through your devotion to your business, it won't, it can't devote itself to you.
Note: If you're in the building phase, then yes, you might have what I call a "douse job" (not a "day job"). A day job is soul sucking. A "douse job" is a non challenging part-time gig, to douse the flames of panic, the fire of anxiety and the bonfire of fear, "tssssst". And there ain't nothing wrong with that.
A Love Letter to your Business
So, have you 1000% decided to commit to your business? How often does the idea of getting a j.o.b. pop up?
If you're not getting the income or freedom results you want, it's because your business is still in kindergarten and you've sent it out into the world expecting it to bring home the bacon. It doesn't work that way. You wouldn't treat your child that way!
But unlike a child, you CAN send your business to "Fast-track Camp" and grow it from Kindergarten to 21-year old legal adult in a very short period of time.
The alternative to "Fast-track Camp" is a practical exercise: write a love letter to your business. Give it a try!
My Love Letter to my Business
(written July 2016, from the personal journal of Ellany Lea)
Ay, I'm so sorry I've neglected you. You've given me so much flexibility and freedom in where I want to live and when I want to work. I'm so sorry I haven't given you more time and affection and care. You deserve better. It's been a very tough Spring and Summer, with selling mom's mold-infested house, getting rid of dad's things [after his passing] and going to Somatic Experiencing Sessions (SE) to heal decades of PTSD.
I know, it's no excuse to ignore you when you've been the vehicle for me to express my life's purpose and the springboard for me to become the best leader, friend, lover and sister I can be. If the shoes were reversed, I would have broken up with me long ago. Hahaha. No, I know it's not funny. LOL! It's sorta funny. Ok, it's not funny. I don't see you laughing.
Had an SE session today but because I left my phone at home, I didn't know that my session got rescheduled. I arrived and was asked to return in 1.5 hrs. I smiled and said of course, and skipped out of there joyfully. Before I met you, I would taken out a titanium bat and pummelled myself into the ground for forgetting my phone (drama queen, I know), I would have dove head first into the well of victimhood and how life is always f***ing with me. Yeah, I wouldn't date me either :P
You made me a better person. YOU made me this skippitty-hoppity joyful being. Well... technically... the mother-f****** excruciating lessons you put me through made me a better person, but who's splitting hairs here. You've grown me beyond what I imagined possible. You've tested me past the breaking point and called me forth to piece myself back together and rise.
If you weren't there urging me to keep going, I don't know where I'd be today. And for this constant companionship, calling forth of my greatness and relentless belief in me, I ask for your forgiveness. Forgive me for having neglected you. Forgive me for having demanded lemonade from you when I only planted the seeds last week. Forgive me for dumping all my burdens onto you.
From the depths of my soul, I thank you for having turned clients into friends, friends into roommates, roommates into soul sisters and soul sisters into family. I finally, FINALLY feel like I belong in this world, regardless of geography. Thank you for eradicating any possiblity of moronic male boss who don't have my talent but take all the credit for my work. I thank you for allowing me the luxurious time to float in a Hammam all day long in the middle of the week or lie on the beach for hours every day listening to audiobooks.
You've given me so much and instead of saying "I'm so not deserving of you", you've taught me to say, "Thank you, I am devoted to you too."
For You • Featuring your Love Letter
Write your Love Letter to your business, send it to me email@example.com, and I will share them starting next Wednesday!
For You • Live Webinar Do's + Don'ts
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